The Eye Opener
- May 12, 2020
- 5 min read

Dear Friend, you are not alone...

I open my eyes feeling waves of self hatred and anger washing over me, succumbing to the ever-growing darkness engulfing me.

I lay there whilst the energy seeped out of my paralyzed body - unable to feel anything as if my thoughts, feelings and emotions don't matter...

Just like I don't matter.

“I can't do this,” I cry softly into the phone. “I’m afraid to be alone.”

My mum’s coming home from work early. Today’s one of my worst days.

They always tell me to tell someone. To talk.

And when I do, they tell me I am making it all up. Just. For. Attention.

But Am I?

No, you’re not.

For me, depression stumbled into my world after a six week summer full of fun, joy and laughter during which I tossed the premature warning signs out of my own regard - unaware of the new reality destined for me. Being born and bred as a Caucasian girl, I’ve always had a perfect family. A perfect house. A perfect house. A perfect life. Or at least that was what it seemed like at the time. "There's no way she's really sad", I hear them say. But what gets to me the most is when I constantly hear people exclaim "She has everything".

While the days passed by, I became increasingly tired. Anxious. Edgy. Emotional. It felt as if the hours grew longer and longer, enabling my solemn feelings to grow worse; becoming more frequent and severe by the second. Soon I began noticing that I felt exactly like it looked outside - gloomy, grey and miserable. I just couldn't go through the motions anymore. I was slowly but steadily dying inside.

If you’re reading this right now and you are currently being held captive by the caliginous forlorn hell of depression slowly swallowing you whole - just know its going to be okay in the end. That glistening light at the end of this dark tunnel will soon arise and so come. Come take my virtual hand and know you’re not alone.

I have always been a Christian, for as long as I can remember - but depression truly tested my faith and trust in God. I was desperately seeking for a key. A key to set my pain and despair free once and for all. A key that would abolish the plethora of sadness encircling my life.

Why won’t you lift me out of this pit? I’d cry out to him. Aren’t you a deliverer? Why do the voices of despair sound so much louder than yours?

Both at the time and now, I didn't and don’t have the answers. However, those 3 questions I constantly questioned taught me 3 truly amazing things that we can all cling to and collectively learn from whilst walking through depression.

1. We were never alone

Being brought up in a Christian household, from a very young age I was always taught that I must not only read and meditate in the Bible but completely rely and trust in it - especially in times of need. So naturally I turned to the Word Of God and within the pages it becomes clear to me that I really am not alone. You see, the Bible provides various examples of fearless followers of God battling depression, darkness and frustration with God himself: * “O Lord, You have deceived me, and I was deceived” (Jeremiah 20:7, English Standard Version).

* “It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life” (1 Kings 19:4, ESV).

* “I say to God, my rock: ‘Why have You forgotten me?’” (Psalm 42:9-10, ESV)

This shows that God isn't angry by these words and deems them holy, emphasising how his mercy and unconditional compassion for us reigns in our brokenness

Above all however, the Bible exclaims several times that the ultimate friend we find our pain is and truly understands what we are going through is Jesus Himself. He wept endlessly for each and every one of us. He died on the cross to liberate us from our sins. He experienced separation from the Father. Jesus KNOWS what it means to suffer.

2. God has and always will be faithful to us despite everything we are going through

Depression makes it extra difficult hard to make the right decisions. During this dark period of my life, my trust in God was dimming, I slowly stopped reading the bible, praying and soon I found my faith lying low next to me on the floor. Nevertheless, I'm glad I made those decisions now looking back at it all and this is because God has taught me a very valuable lesson. His love for me depends on his divine character full of grace and goodness. That's it. I placed my faith in Jesus because he saved me from my sins and brokenness many many years ago. As we come out of Easter, I want you all to remember that he has never and will never walk away from us - especially when we put our complete faith in him.

3. Our pain is always heard and used for the greater GOOD

God can handle our doubts. He can handle our worries, frustrations, failures and darkest moments because He is an gracious GOOD God who loves us through it all.

I can't help but get myself all worked up and get very emotionally hysterical when I hear people say they want to end their lives - because I have been there. Empathy is powerful. It enables us to comfort others and know how to pray for them.

Ultimately, God will always use us to bring hope to others who are hurting because we’ve been where they are and made it to the other side. Hope means the most when it comes, stumbling, out of the dark places.

So, if you’re depressed and you feel as though you are unable to someone that you truly trust like a doctor, counsellor, family member or even a close friend ~ always remember that you can tell JESUS because he understands and knows what you are going through so he will help you and guide you along this dark path of your life and lead you to his everlasting bright light

WHY? Because of His compassionate nature - he loves you so much and he would never want you to feel this way and face this darkness alone.

Turn to him and discover "THE BATTLE IS NOT YOURS BUT GOD'S" 2 Chronicles 20:15

DEALING WITH DEPRESSION ~ Easter Special

Thank you so much for allowing your eyes to be opened once more through another post! I sincerely hope and pray that this message has touched you for the better.

Remember, TEO will have a new message up for you all every week so grab some friends and join us or journey with us solo on our eye-opening adventure! Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comments section down below.